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Donkey

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#1
Ok so donkey giveaway time. I’m bored. You’re bored

tell me a story, a joke, suggest a Snapchat filter you’d like to see, Just anything tbh! Then I’ll pick a user at random on Monday and give out a subscription. Maybe 2 I’ll see

go go go
 
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#4
The only one I can think of right now, also I really want this subscription!

A lady was shopping, carrying her bags and it was heavy. She asked a man to help her carry home but man said 'only for a chocolate biscuit'. Lady gives him a chocolate biscuit then the man helps her carry the shopping home. Now they arrive home, then lady ask man can help to bring in the shopping, 'only for a chocolate biscuit'. Ok, he gets one then lady ask if he could go upstairs and have sex with her, 'only for a chocolate biscuit' then they have sex upstairs. Now the dad arrives home, lady tells man to hide in cupboard quickly, 'only for a chocolate biscuit', so he gets one then hides in the cupboard. The dad runs upstairs into her bedroom, shouting asking who she had sex with, plucked her pubes one by one to inspect a sex and on the last pube, he shouted 'come out, you bastard!' then the man popped his head out and said 'only for a chocolate biscuit'.

And this one everyone knows, man knocks on door and lady shouts that she is in the shower, but he says that he is the blind man. Lady replies ok why not come in and the man enters the room to see her in the shower.
 

JMG

habbo enthusiast
Staff member
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#7
The only one I can think of right now, also I really want this subscription!

A lady was shopping, carrying her bags and it was heavy. She asked a man to help her carry home but man said 'only for a chocolate biscuit'. Lady gives him a chocolate biscuit then the man helps her carry the shopping home. Now they arrive home, then lady ask man can help to bring in the shopping, 'only for a chocolate biscuit'. Ok, he gets one then lady ask if he could go upstairs and have sex with her, 'only for a chocolate biscuit' then they have sex upstairs. Now the dad arrives home, lady tells man to hide in cupboard quickly, 'only for a chocolate biscuit', so he gets one then hides in the cupboard. The dad runs upstairs into her bedroom, shouting asking who she had sex with, plucked her pubes one by one to inspect a sex and on the last pube, he shouted 'come out, you bastard!' then the man popped his head out and said 'only for a chocolate biscuit'.

And this one everyone knows, man knocks on door and lady shouts that she is in the shower, but he says that he is the blind man. Lady replies ok why not come in and the man enters the room to see her in the shower.
Damn this guy deserves it. Only for a chocolate biscuit.
 

Adil

DevBest CEO
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#9
two geezers were playing golf
one geezer hit the ball into the rough and they went to go look for it
while looking for the ball they saw a funeral procession pass by

one of the geezers, let's call him John, stood and took his hat off as the procession went by
once it passed, John's mate turned to John and said "that was really respectful of you"

John replied "yeah, it was the least I could do, I was only married to her for 30 years"
 

Lotus

Legacy, it's all anyone leaves behind.
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#10
A senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership. Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little gray hair he had left. Amazing, he thought as he flew down I-94, pushing the pedal even more.

Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a state trooper behind him, lights flashing and siren blaring. He floored it to 100 mph, then 110, then 120. Suddenly he thought, What am I doing? I'm too old for this, and pulled over to await the trooper's arrival.

Pulling in behind him, the trooper walked up to the Corvette, looked at his watch, and said, "Sir, my shift ends in 30 minutes. Today is Friday. If you can give me a reason for speeding that I've never heard before, I'll let you go."

The old gentleman paused. Then he said, "Years ago, my wife ran off with a state trooper. I thought you were bringing her back."

"Have a good day, sir," replied the trooper.
 

Adil

DevBest CEO
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#11
A senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership. Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little gray hair he had left. Amazing, he thought as he flew down I-94, pushing the pedal even more.

Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a state trooper behind him, lights flashing and siren blaring. He floored it to 100 mph, then 110, then 120. Suddenly he thought, What am I doing? I'm too old for this, and pulled over to await the trooper's arrival.

Pulling in behind him, the trooper walked up to the Corvette, looked at his watch, and said, "Sir, my shift ends in 30 minutes. Today is Friday. If you can give me a reason for speeding that I've never heard before, I'll let you go."

The old gentleman paused. Then he said, "Years ago, my wife ran off with a state trooper. I thought you were bringing her back."

"Have a good day, sir," replied the trooper.
hahahahahahaha
 

Donkey

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#12
post with most likes will win tomorrow

edit: niko and ill choose someone else later
 
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